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It’s unclear whether this moron Michael Alan Skopec was drunk beyond belief or had just returned home from a lobotomy, but either way, he was angry! Why? IPHONE NO WORK. So, naturally, he called the US’ 911 number. Repeatedly. Here are the tapes.
The Smoking Gun got its hands on the pathetic, slurred, semi-coherent pleas for help after police released them to a public eager to laugh at drunk people. “How ‘bout I smash this phone on the floor?,” Skopec asks. We wonder—what phone was he calling from? A second iPhone? A landline? Was the iPhone really broken, or had he tried to drink part of it?
After calling a fifth time, asking once more if he should destroy the phone via floor-smash, the 911 operator asks if he’d like some police help with the iPhone, given Apple customer support’s failings. “That’s pretty strong,” Skopec worried, and wondered if it wasn’t “a little dumb” for a cop to help with the iPhone. Dumbness was in the air, and as Skopec halfheartedly told the operator to “go to hell,” cops were on the way to arrest him for “obstructing/resisting” a police officer, and for being so unbelievably stupid that it risked forming a black hole in the middle of Kendall County, IL.
Enjoy the tapes for yourself, and drink responsibly, or elshu toyuf fucknnnnnnnnnb iphOne mightn itoi DIALING DAMNIT.
Drunk Idiot Takes a Nap On Airport Baggage Belt And Gets X-Rayed
Drunk Idiot Dangles Upside Down from Power Cables
The Sweet Grapefruit That Gets You Drunk
This really brightened up my night at work. is that ok? IS THAT OK?!
I’ll allow it
pity there isn’t an iphone app that prevents you making dumb phone calls when drunk (like to ex’s or police, etc.)…or is there?
mind you, if there was, I don’t think he’d use it.
For me this app is called “leave your phone at home before a messy night”, for my brother it is usually “drop it in the toilet”. Thank god for kind Apple geniuses who keep replacing it for him
more importantly, why didn’t they tell him to fuck off in the first 20 seconds?
Best bit…
Guy – Why isn’t my iPhone working?
911 Operator – I don’t know why your phone isn’t working.
Guy – That’s pretty dumb
911 Operator – On whose part!
Simply fixed
Douche: My iPhone is not working!
Operator: This number is reserved for emergencies only, do one!
*Hang up*