The Windows 8 consumer preview is utterly delightful. But I have a huge suspicion that by the time it ships, it could completely suck. And that’s because the people who make the machines on which it is installed will fuck it right up with a bunch of crap.
When you buy a new computer, before it arrives in your hands, the manufacturer installs Windows on it. And when they do, they often install a bunch of other useless programs as well, because the software vendors pay them to. It helps bring prices down, and you can think of them as sort of being like ads subsidising your hardware. The thing is, they also tend to seriously degrade performance.
I’d been using a Windows 8 test rig provided by Microsoft for several days, and it was great. But I was curious how the experience would translate to my personal machine. So I installed it on my little HP Pavilion notebook. Sure enough, I loved it there too.
But it hit me that one of the things I’m loving so much is that neither of these builds is cluttered up with a horrible bunch of junk that’s only there because some jerk in Palo Alto did a deal with Symantec or Roxio or some dumb fucking game that nobody would ever willingly install on a machine. It means my older, cheap little notebook actually runs better on a new operating system—because it doesn’t have a million unnecessary things going on in the background. One of my last glimpses of Windows 7 on the Pavillion was this banner popping up to remind me that without The Nortons, I’m going to be eaten by Sasquatches or something:

It was a fitting goodbye.
I don’t want to just single out HP. Basically every major OEM clutters up Windows with garbage crapware. At CES this year, one of the things Vizio was touting about its all-in-ones and ultrabooks was that they’d come with “clean” builds of Windows. Think about that: Vizio is using what it doesn’t include as a selling point. Dell has done the same thing in the past. And at one point, Sony was even trying to charge an extra few bob to not install a bunch of horrible crap all over your nice new computer.
Not that this is news to any longtime Windows user. I don’t recall if my version of Windows 3.1 came with a bunch of turdy trialware all over it, but I know that my Windows 95 machine and every subsequent one I bought thereafter was littered like a Times Square sidewalk. Typically one of my first tasks when I get a new machine is to begin uninstalling as much crapware as I can. It’s abundantly clear that I’m not alone in that. Even Microsoft is aware of what a terrible problem it is, otherwise it wouldn’t make such a big deal about the PCs it sells in its store being Microsoft Signature PCs. That means no bloatware.
And its clear that Microsoft is working to make sure that you won’t need as much of that third party stuff with Windows 8. It’s baking in a lot of the traditional add-ons as native features. For example, its next generation operating system will come with a beefed up version of Windows Defender. You’d hope that would kill the need for some of the many irksome extras most people have to couple with Windows. And yet, despite Defender being on by default, Microsoft is still promoting lots of third party security vendors.
One of the great things about Windows 8 is that it’s all clean lines and clutter-free. Yet I strongly suspect that, behind the scenes, OEMs are at this very moment already making deals to load up their machines with unnecessary software to bring costs down. It’s going to happen.
That is, unless Microsoft actively works to stop OEMs from polluting its system and dragging down its brand. Microsoft has already been quite daring in breaking with the past in terms of user interface. And its certainly not afraid to be a bully. If it truly wants Windows 8 to be a radically better user experience, it needs to use its power in the marketplace to force OEMs to stop ruining Windows.













Another quality reason to go OS X.
Oh… now wait for the “ur a fanboi, n00b!” trolling that will go along with this.
Spending 2-3 minutes downloading CCleaner and uninstalling a few bits of bloatware is no reason to go for a mac and spend a month getting used to a totally new user interface. It is, however, another good reason to build your own PC, along with the better specifications for lower cost you’ll get.
I agree, I’ve either built or spec’d most of my PCs. Laptops are prone to this, but for the sake of 10 minutes of ‘uninstall’; if it subsidises the price and encourages stupid people to use antivirus, then I can’t see what all the fuss is about. Irritating, agreed, but none of this affects the OS, past or present
‘…. fuck it right up with a bunch of crap.’ simply doesn’t make sense.
Correction: another quality reason to go Linux.
I use OS X, Linux and various Unices on a daily basis and I’m incredibly excited about Windows 8.
OS X may not have 3rd party crud all over the place, but it does have a load of Tonka Toy apps that you have to replace with 3rd party apps to get decent functionality.
I think people give Windows 7 a really hard time, when actually it’s pretty good. Yes, it has a lot to learn from Apple and the Open Source world, but I’d say looking at Windows 8 that Microsoft have taken notice and now have something to teach the competition.
If they can find a compromise between the Apple App Store and Open Source package management I’ll be pleased as punch.
Microsoft has the ability to change computing and mobile tech for the vast majority of the Western World. That’s pretty awesome.
Windows 8 on a Phone looks awesome too. iPhones don’t let you do enough and Android is a mess.
Well done Microsoft.
Oh and yeah, the first thing you do when you get a new PC is install vanilla Windows.
Obviously.
This I can sympathise with – which is why the first thing I do when I get a new PC is get out my trusty MSDN windows disks and re-install the whole thing again
How can Windows 8 possibly get ruined anymore than Microsoft has ruined it?
Haha I though that MikJe had trademark on comments like that..
We can only hope PC makers remove the MetroUI crap, that would at least make Windows 8 slightly better.
That probably won’t happen, it’s a core part of the OS.
Maybe OS developers should start making rules about people crapping all over their OS.
Looking at you android….
Yeh go to Mac OSX where you can play no games because they’re all developed for Windows and where you’re locked into to shitty over priced hardware.
I must credit HP here, as when going into system recovery, you get the option to re install Windows without the included programs.
Lenovo has done the same with some of their Thinkpads in the past too.
I had a Sony Vaio laptop that did this too.
Yeah, of course OEMs will bundle the OS with loads of crapware when they sell a laptop (just like a number of freeware installers bundle toolbars and the like).
Either remove it or buy a separate copy of Windows and install that.
It’s not that difficult.
I find a bit of uninstalling never works to cleanse a new windows PC of its crapware. I clean reinstall of Windows is probably the best way.
There’s always a few stubborn shits of programs that make it really hard to remove and probably leave registry entries and other remnants behind.
Removing unnecessary software is kinda satisfying, isn’t it? No problem if you’re a power user.
But most people are afraid to touch the default software on their computers, because: 1 – they don’t know how it got there, 2 – they don’t know what it does or whether they might need it. So if they decide after uninstalling that they DO need it, there would be no way of getting it back.
The best solution is providing a simple guide that lists all the Windows native software, with a message to the effect of ‘anything else is non-essential, and you can probably remove it’.
When I get a new laptop, I always wipe the HDD and install fresh windows. Now, I have an ASUS X53E laptop and my serial directs me to the K53E download page.
I rang ASUS to ask if it was the correct drivers and they recommended I just use my backup partition, I said I don’t have it because I wiped the HDD because of the crapload of bloatware I didn’t want. They then proceeded to inform me that I WILL (not might) have caused severe degradation of my new system by uninstalling the bloatware and this could affect my warranty. Flabbergasted at this appalling lie I politely said, “I beg to differ” and asked again if that was the correct download page.
Something tells me if companies are happy to blatantly lie about the benefits of their bloatware and force it on people then this trend is going to continue into Windows 8.
Norton.. at one time my pc worked really fast then i installed you..