Hapless Thief Utterly Nuked By Insane Chilli Heat

By Sam Gibbs on at

A shoplifter in Bristol bit off way more than he could chew when he decided it'd be a marvellous idea to half inch a bundle of Scotch Bonnet chillies. The hapless crim bundled a load into his gob before attempting to make a run for it. Big mistake.

The mental underachiever barely managed to make it out of the shop door, moments after chomping through the insanely hot chillies, before he succumbed to the extreme power of the Bonnet. The rozzers found him doubled over in pain, coughing violently and vomiting all over the place -- that's what 350,000 Scovilles will do to you. The 39-year-old, Marcus Banwell, was found with cocaine and heroine on his person, plus a clarinet, apparently, but it was the chillies that were his undoing.

Lesson learned -- if you're trying to pinch yourself some fiery veg, don't slam a sample in your gob before you try and bail out of the shop. Or better yet, just buy the damn things, how expensive can they really be when you need so few of them? If only chillies had been on the menu during the riots; would have made the coppers' jobs a hell of a lot easier. [The Register]

Image credit: Chilli heat from Shutterstock