We like to anthropomorphize the objects in our lives, assigning our tools and tech personalities of their own. But some just go ahead and do it for you. The gadgets you are about to see wear their hearts on their sleeves.
HAPPY: That wide-eyed innocence. “Everybody is going to want me,” thinks the Sony HDR-TD10e 3D camcorder. “I’m going to change the world.”
SAD: This morning, this moped’s wife left him for a Vespa. He’s not sure he has the will go on.
HAPPY: Look at that soul-patch. Look at those slits for eyes. This coffee-maker is high as hell.
SAD: The blank stare of resignation. The mascara made of ashes. The world’s saddest cigarette butt depository, St. John Street, Clerkenwell, England.
SAD: What horrors have you seen, smoke detector?
HAPPY: Hello, little windshield-wiper fluid dispenser! Aren’t you just the cutest thing?
Photo: - luz -
SAD: Shock, as the newsbox realizes its face is made of poop.
HAPPY: That carefree, off-center grin. This is the Dennis Quaid of alarm clocks.
Photo: (c) Witthaya/Stockfresh
SAD: For every happy alarm clock, there is another that has known untellable sorrow.
SAD: Now is the bathtub of our discontent…
Photo: Edgar Sousa
HAPPY: Are you winking at me, you saucy little key tension adjustment knob on a Remington typewriter? Behave…
SAD: Are you sick, little lock? Say, “Ahh!”
HAPPY: USB man thinks he’s so fresh with his flattop.
SAD: “Who will play with me now?” asked the tape, alone, from the floorboard of a 1987 Buick LeSabre.
HAPPY: Sony Ericsson camera phone is clearly manic depressive. Here you see a very high high before it spirals once again into darkness.
Photo: slideshow bob
SAD: You’d be frowning too if you were a Samsung watch-phone nobody bought.
HAPPY: Gets tremendous satisfaction from weighing things.
SAD: Doorbell/letterbox has the disposition (and eyebrows) of Bert from Sesame Street.
SAD: “I can perk up everyone, except myself,” laments the espresso machine.
Image curation by Attila Nagy