Here at Giz UK, we’re blessed with one of the rarest creatures on the internet: an intelligent and actually-understandable body of commenters who aren’t just a bunch of faeces-flinging pre-adolescent monkeys.

As a result, we’re pretty liberal with the comments section — you’re not going to find your comments mysteriously going walkies just because they disagree with the Politburo line. That said, there are some things that we’d prefer you steer clear of, old chap.

 

Racism/Homophobia/Hate Speech

This should go without saying, but any kind of completely inappropriate racism, homophobia or hate speech will get you banned faster than you can say “but no-one on YouTube seemed to mind!”

 

Telling Us What To Cover

Giz UK is not just a tech blog. We’ve said this before, but it’s worth repeating: we don’t just churn out iPhone rumours or tech news, day in day out. We try and post stuff that we, as actual real people, find interesting and want to share with others. If this annoys you, feel free to scurry off to one of hundreds of excellent other tech sites out there. (Oh, and the same thing goes for asking us if it’s a slow news day. We really don’t like that.)

 

Personal Attacks

Saying you disagree with someone’s comment, or even with one of our author’s articles, is absolutely fine — no-one’s ever had an interesting conversation where all they do is agree with each other. However, if you call someone an “Apple d*ck-sucking c**t”, you’ll find yourself sporting a banhammer-shaped bruise rather pronto.

 

Trolling

We can tell when you’re doing it. Just go hide back under your bridges, seriously.

 

First!!!!!!

 

Avatars

Want to add a picture to go along with your ’50s-movie-title-pun-username? You’ve got two options. If you’ve already fed your details into the gaping belly of the Zuckerbeast (that’s Facebook, to you and me), you can sign into Gizmodo with your Facebook username and password, and your Facebook profile pic will roll itself up really tight, hop into the internet pipes, and mosey on over to Giz HQ, where we’ll Pritstik it onto your account for you.

If not, you can sign up for a fresh new commenting account if you don’t already have one, and upload an avatar by joining Gravatar with the same email address you use to comment with on Giz. It takes quite literally one whole minute of your life, and then you’ll be up and being bullied for your choice of picture in no time.

 

Gold Stars

Although our commenting system’s pretty simple — no up/down/left/right/shake-it-all-about voting to do here — there is one badge of honour you can lust after. Gold stars, as proudly worn by our top commenters to distinguish themselves from the proletariat, can be won in two ways — either amass a total of 20 likes (across all your posts, not just one), or bribe/impress an existing gold-star-member to bestow the magic on you. Once you’ve got your star, it’s pretty much un-losable — so don’t go all Anakin Skywalker on us — use your powers to do good (and remember who your father is, or something? Been a long time since we watched Star Wars. More of a Trekkie, anyway.)