So, did you know that Bill Clinton couldn't even keep track of the US nuclear codes, let alone his mistresses? According to a former US General, Clinton managed to "misplace" the codes for a matter of months, something described as "a big deal". That's a teensy bit of an understatement.

This isn't the first time allegations like this have been made, either -- another high-ranking US military officer claimed that Clinton actually lost them on the morning the Monica Lewinsky story leaked. I mean, talk about a crappy day. But still. For the love of Christ. How hard is it? "Right, have I got everything? Keys, wallet, condoms, nuclear codes....nuclear codes? Anyone seen them..." [Telegraph]