37 
Ok, so the last couple of days have seen some rumours flying round about an alleged 4.8″ iPhone, the “iPhone Math”. We didn’t post it because the rumours are an absolute crock of bullshit, and we don’t want to insult your intelligence. We’re better than that, and so are you. But it’s worth pointing out that if you’re going to fabricate a rumour, for the love of all things holy come up with a better name than “iPhone Math”.
According to the China Times, the iPhone Math (Note: it might be iPhone Plus, the translation’s uncertain; either way, it’s a terrible attempt at naming) will sport a 4.8″ screen, launch in June, and come complete with magic unicorns and Tim Cook clones, because this rumour is a steaming pile of crap.
I mean seriously. We know that Steve Jobs was bad at names, but “iPhone Math”? What is this thing, a frigging iOS-powered calculator? Is ‘Math’ meant to represent the “simplicity and elegance of maths, translated to the physical world” or somesuch marketing crap? I don’t know, but either way — true or false — it’s a shitty name ,either for a product, or for a rumour.
I mean, it wouldn’t even work in the UK (and Apple, if you think that you can single-handedly get us to use “math” instead of “maths” in the UK, jog on). In fact, I think it’s the worst name of all time. What do you reckon — can you come up with anything more god-awful? [Cult of Mac]
How Your Ears Do Maths Better Than Mathematicians
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iSheepswillbuythisdullpieceofshitwhateveritiscalled
iamapretentiousarsewhothinksmydeviceissuperioreventhoughitisthesamedamnPhone Aslasttimejustwithmoreglass-S?
I’d still love to see you under those treads!
I don’t know any Russians with Bulldozers but I know one with a tractor, will that do?
I’m not sure a tractor will do the job, perchance would your Russian friends have access to a combine harvester? <3
Only a tractor sorry. Bare in mind, it is somehow powered by Android.
5.1 Tractor Bean ^_^ sounds perfect ^_^
I’d like to see the turd off that iphone smeared all other your pathetic face but I suspect that’s happened many times before already.
Now feel free to continue your insightful copy and paste humourless posting.
I’d still love to see you under those treads!
You are my second creepy stalker on here, you and that shark guy should get a room.
I’d still love to see you under those treads!!
I saw when you were being stalked by Shark, made me giggle. Now I am stalking both you and TSeng because I find your interactions rather amusing.
I love you too NTJ
Feel free, you are funny and human unlike TSeng and sharky. Wouldn’t be surprised if they were the same person
You’ve been practising with that “free” copy of Photoshop, haven’t you.
The iPhone Turd, would be a worse name. Though more honest.
This is hardly my finest Photoshop creation!
Didn’t even use a modern iPhone.
i beg to differ, i rather like this one
iPhone Large?
iPhone Big?
iPhone Next?
i-a-bit-larger-than-our-previous-Phone
iPhone Double-Science?
iPhone 5 3/4?
iPhone 9 3/4, for Harry Potter fans!
Darn, how did I miss that? I guess it is because I am uncultured and have never been a Harry Potter fan.
iPhone Trojan ?
iiCaptain?
iJimLad?
iHadANiceLunchToday?
iNeedToGoHome?
Going back to the old Billy Connolly use of the word ‘Jobbie’ for a turd makes the amalgamation of the iphone and a steaming turd perhaps the most suitable comment on the cult of Jobs
I believe this is Glaswegian for a shit, not just Billyish.
It’s not just Glasgow. I’m not sure if it’s just a general Scottish phrase, but my side of the family that lives in and around Edinburgh also use it.
I would tend to agree. Although I like the word Glaswegian as often as possible. Glaswegian trousers.
are Glaswegian Trousers tight trousers for girls?
I’m saying nothing
iPhone Android
No Sam, adding Android would only improve the iPhone.
wait does that mean the cpu would only be able to do one type of maths, as math is the singular of maths, add two numbers would be math, adding and subtracting would be maths (I presume in ‘murica they are only taught how to add numbers, no subtraction, multiplication, algebra)
“Note: it might be iPhone Plus”
You kind of ruined your rant there by introducing a hint of plausibility.
Shocked that it took so long for someone to point out that iPhone Plus was mentioned and is the far more likely name. Silly rant from Chris.
“iphone laceless dynamo 3000″
iFone
Are people still buying iPhones? How very 2008….
Are people still being fanboys? How very…200-
no unfortunately it’s only getting worse.
I refuse to buy a product i want because other like them.
I had an iphone until fairly recently. It’s become very dull. Not a lot has changed in the last few years OS-wise. They need to do something to freshen it up a bit. It’s in danger of becoming very out of date.
So? Does it do everything you want it to? Sure, so does an android phone. So does a windows phone. They all have apps, inbuilt phones, and internet browsers. All phones are really the same so stick with what you like and stop moaning about other platforms and the “dangers” they face.
Yes, that’s a great idea. We’ll all stop giving our opinion here on Giz, just because you say so. Why stop here? Lets stop giving opinions everywhere because someone on the internet said so! In fact, lets have them shut Giz down in case anyone else writes something you don’t like.
If you’re so sensitive, I suggest the internet isn’t for you.
Sigh. Opinions are fine, fanboyism isn’t. Saying “I like this because of x and don’t like this about y” is an opinion. Saying “X sucks because of this”, or “Y is in danger because I know everything so much better than CEOs responsible for billions of dollars of revenue” is just ignorance.
If you’re such a fear monger, I suggest the internet isn’t for you.
Actually I retract my last statement. It seems the internet unfortunately is exactly for you.
Settings > Brightness and Wallpaper > Slide right to maximum > Turn Auto-Brightness to ‘off’.
You’re welcome, that’s £10 please.
Mmmm, chocolate pretzel!
iPhone 6: Now with a reason to buy the same phone you’ve all been buying since the iPhone 3G.
iPhone Home – The E.T. sponsored landline handset?
iPhablet
Key Lime Pie
iCatchup
“iPhone Math” is obviously a poor translation from the Chinese origins of this bit of info.
I came here just for the pic.
Fuckin SAVED!