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There’s nothing that simultaneously terrifies and excites us Brits like a wee bit of snow. For the whole night before a minor snowfall, the news will be filled with hacks eagerly reporting on grit stockpiles, weather forecasters bounce around like small children, and Ranulph Fiennes gets called in to lecture on frostbite. It’s a BIG DEAL. But don’t worry, it’s just a bit of precipitation: you’re a 21st Century man or woman, and you can beat nature!
The first rule to remember when battling great Mother Nature is the Boy Scouts mythical motto: be prepared. Driving in the snow is no small undertaking. There are two main life-threatening dangers here: snow on the road makes the surface slippery, meaning you might crash, which is bad both for your treasured car and for your poor fragile human body; the other danger is that you get stuck and freeze to death — not a nice option either.
Driving safely in the snow is a mixture of secret Jedi driving tricks and boring preparation. Let’s tackle the dull stuff first:
- Tyres: Make sure your tyres are inflated to the correct pressure, and that they’ve still got a decent amount of tread on them (3mm plus). If you live out in the countryside, it’s worth your while investing in a set of winter tyres, which have a deeper tread and different compound of rubber to help you stay on the road and out of snow-filled ditches.
- Chains: Again, worth considering if you live out in the ‘cuds and your roads aren’t regularly cleared. Chains sit on top of your tyres and should allow you to drive on a moderately snow-covered road. Check to see which model is best for your particular car and wheels, and remember to take them off before you drive on a non-snow-covered road, otherwise it’ll all end in tears.
- Battery: Sadly, in the cold, batteries run down quicker. To avoid having to try and push-start your car through a few inches of snow, make sure you do a long drive occasionally, or get a trickle-charger to juice that battery up. Trust me, pushing a freezing-cold car through the snow along a slippery road is an experience that just plain sucks.
- Screenwash: Make sure you keep it topped up, and use a mixture that won’t freeze up in the Arctic conditions of Britain in a cold snap.
- Fuel: Keep full where you can, and if possible keep a jerrycan of fuel stashed in your boot. Playing I-Spy-the-frozen-icicle-on-your-frostbitten-nose while freezing your arse off waiting for the breakdown wagon is not an appropriate or family-friendly game.
- Windows: Sounds obvious, but don’t try and do a WWII tank commander and clear a tiny slit to see through; take the time to properly clean off your windows and mirrors of snow and ice before you get underway. A pro tip: don’t pour boiling water onto your windscreen, as this will quite possibly cause the glass to rapidly heat up and shatter. While this admittedly removes the ice, you’ll be picking broken bits of glass out of your seat for months.
The best way to scrape ice is with an ice scraper; if you don’t have one to hand, a plastic spatula works a treat. Metal implements will just damage your window, so avoid them at all cost. If you’re having real trouble, de-icer spray can be purchased that will soften the hardest of frozen-over windscreens.
- Locks: especially if you’re burdened with an older runabout, locks can freeze up in winter. A squirt of good ‘ole WD40 will stop this.
- Emergency/breakdown kit: The big danger, if you are unfortunate enough to break down/get stranded on the road, is freezing to death. Stick a couple of blankets or old coats in the boot, so you’ve got something to hunker down in if the worst happens. It’s also worth throwing a bottle of water and some energy bars in there, in case you’re stranded for a couple of hours. (A pack of cards also helps.) Make sure that you’ve got your fancy-schmancy smartphone so you can ring for help/play Angry Birds until the rescue team arrive.
It’s also worth checking your breakdown kit. Normally, cars have a spare wheel of some kind, the gear for changing it, and other helpful stuff like a first aid kit and hi-vis triangle. Do yourself a favour, and make sure it’s all still there — if you can change your own flat, you’ll save yourself a good few hours waiting for the breakdown truck, especially since the AA will be maxed out with calls on a snowy day.
The AA provides the following secret Jedi mind-tricks for actually driving your car in the snow:
- Wear comfortable, dry shoes for driving. Cumbersome, snow-covered boots will slip on the pedals.
- Pull away in second gear, easing your foot off the clutch gently to avoid wheel-spin.
- Up hill: avoid having to stop part way up by waiting until it is clear of other cars or by leaving plenty of room to the car in front. Keep a constant speed, choosing the most suitable gear well in advance to avoid having to change down on the hill.
- Down hill: reduce your speed before the hill, use a low gear and try to avoid using the brakes. Leave as much room as possible between you and the car in front.
- If you have to use brakes then apply them gently. Release the brakes and de-clutch if the car skids.
- Automatic transmission – under normal driving conditions (motorways, etc) it’s best to select ‘Drive’ and let the gearbox do the work throughout the full gear range. In slippery, snowy conditions it’s best to select ’2′, which limits the gear changes and also makes you less reliant on the brakes. Some autos have a ‘Winter’ mode which locks out first gear to reduce the risk of wheel spin. Check the handbook.
If you do get properly bogged down in snow (unlikely in all but the most remote parts of Britain), here are a few tips to get you out:
- Check your exhaust pipe before you start the car. If it’s buried in snow, your engine will have decreased power and carbon monoxide might build up in the car and kill you. Awkward.
- Dig out excessive snow from around the wheels
- Stick those old blankets you put in the boot earlier under/in front of the wheels (roll them up first to give a firm base for the wheels). This will allow the wheels to actually get some traction.
- Rock the car back and forth a tiny bit, accelerating until the wheels just start to slip, and then easing off again. This can scoop a tiny bit of snow out each time, eventually letting you drive away. Requires patience and clutch control beyond the reach of many mere mortals.
- Emergency/pro tip only: deflate your tyres slightly, allowing the surface area of the tyre in contact with the snow to increase, allowing you to drive out. This is very much a last resort, and especially dangerous if, like most of the population, you don’t keep an air compressor in your car.
- Ride the brakes: putting the brakes on ever so slightly whilst accelerating the car in theory increases the amount of torque necessary for the wheels to turn and should help prevent wheelspin. Again, this is an emergency tip and can do unspeakable things to your car. You’re probably better off waiting for the tow truck.
It’s a well-known fact that National Rail are pathetic snow-fearing babies who run away at the merest flake of the white stuff. If you’re reliant on trains for your commute, there’s little you can do about National Rail’s shittiness, but forewarned is forearmed; I’m sure that somewhere in The Art of War it says something about “knowing your enemy is really important” or somesuch like that. Anyway. The point is that if you know that the trains are borked before you leave for the station, it’s much easier to make alternate arrangements.
The National Rail website isn’t half bad; the service disruptions page has a list of all delays caused by snow or otherwise, or you can sign up for customised email or SMS alerts, or you can just follow them on Twitter if you’re into that whole social media thing.
Assuming you’re one of the enlightened masses with a half-decent smartphone, you can also check how screwed the trains are right from your pocket; I use the cross-platform Journey Pro (free on iOS and Android), but there are lots of others, including National Rail’s official app.
If you normally train to work but Transport for London’s throwing a hissy fit about the “slippery rails”, try walking or cycling to work. Yeah, cycling in the snow can be a little bit dodgy, but on all but the most snowed-in roads it’s a pretty damn good option. If you’re going to try it, ideally use a mountain bike, or at least get some knobbly tyres for your ride.
Also remember to wrap up warm, and plan a route in advance — you might know your tube commuting route down to angle is best to enter the train carriage at, but you’ll still have absolutely no fecking clue about the actual path to take on the roads. Google Maps can help you here. (Unless, of course, you’re on a Windows Phone and Google hates you.)
Of course, there is a Third Way. Rather than battle through the gummed-up road network or pathetic excuse for a rail infrastructure, call your boss with an apologetic “sorry, it’s snowing and I can’t make it in today”, whack those PJs on and crank up the (insert feelgood music of choice here); it’s ‘work’ at home day!
I’m not going to say that working from home is a total skiving doss (otherwise my boss may never let me do it again), but it’s pretty damn sweet. The key is to log on nice and early, while still in bed and half-asleep, and make it seem like you’re keen to do work. You can then drag projects out with infeasible delays and hang-ups; if your work isn’t totally brain-intensive, you can probably multitask nicely between ‘working’ and watching old people flog crap on Antiques Roadshow.
All in all, though the snow might be wet, cold and fierce, you can beat it. Unless you’re totally dependent on the train network (and boy do we feel your pain), you can probably trek into work somehow. If you have the option though, working from home is easy and painless, and provides endless procrastination opportunities.
Written from the safety of my bed. God, I love the internet.
Image credits:
Header image: Winter from Shutterstock
1st image: Checklist from Shutterstock
2nd image: ArcticTrucks
3rd image: Snow Train from Shutterstock
4th image: Mountain Biker from Shutterstock
5th image: Man on Laptop from Shutterstock
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My god that mechanic in the first picture is balancing a car on his head, how novel.
Damn you – got there before me!!
He’s actually called Jack….
…and his mate’s called Axel.
And his sister is called Flange
All these puns are really giving me a lift!
Give it a brake guys.
Staying in bed till its gone sounds good to me
The first picture guy has an amazing car hat.
I have a sleeping bag, ice axe and butane stove in the back of my car, but then, I live in Scotland…. In a car in Scotland….
You sound like a right proper climber!
Oh, I don’t know. The axe doesn’t get much use these days, I’m hoping to have an ice climbing renaissance in my 40s.
Axe singular? Gonna have a hard time doing gnarly stuff with that!
Yeah, I’d need another one for ice climbing, but you only use one for hill walking in the snow – mainly to prod dodgy cornices or arrest your downward tumble in a fall.
Better to commute on trains that still run on diesel engine as oppose to electricity.
For driving, I’d add “Don’t brake or accelerate whilst steering”
People who try and brake while going round corners either understeer into a hedge or swap ends. Both outcomes are usually accompanied by a quick performance of jazz hands on the steering wheel.
You missed one. Don’t eat the yellow kind.
As someone who is working from home on this very day, I’d say the biggest perk is being allowed to wear pyjamas to your desk. And when I say desk, I mean, bed.
I’ve just had a customer in here wearing their pyjamas and a dressing gown, complaining that the snow has soaked their slippers. Turns out you can wear pyjamas eanywhere these days.
Why didn’t I think of that when I went to Sainsbury’s earlier? Dammit!
Remember to not only clear your windscreen of snow, but the roof as well. About 10 mins after the cabin becomes comfortably warm, the heat will radiate through the roof and melt a lubricating layer of water between the roof and the snow. Any sudden deceleration and you’ll find all the snow that was on your roof is now obscuring your windscreen!
Also, cycling to work in the snow can also be attempted on a racing bike with slick tyres if you fancy making it a little more entertaining!
I seem to remember either last year or the one before the police in some areas were pulling people over for not clearing their roof on the basis that it could be a hazard for other drivers when it fell off even if it didn’t go over the windscreen.
Yes, it’s a nightmare driving behind someone when a massive lump of snow flies off their roof, blinding you.
As someone who walks 2.5 miles to work every day, when wrapping up warm it’s better to go for multiple layers rather than one huge padded layer. Choose a decent pair of boots and ensure they’ve still got plenty of tread left in them. Add 10-15 minutes to your expected journey time to account for tricky sections or deeper than expected snow. Where ever possible walk on uncompressed snow as the worn, compressed part will be the slippiest bit. For frosty conditions walk on the white frost as the dark bit is usually black ice. If it gets too bad, consider taking a hiking pole or two with you.
My work bag usually contains a snugpack body warmer, a waterproof jacket, a light fleece hoody, hat, gloves, walking pole, spare vibram fivefingers, gel hand warmers, small hand towel, as well as the things I need for work. Since I wear a medium weight fleece I can mix and match items depending on the weather conditions. I’ve never understood why people panick so much at a little snow.
Look dude, we said “be prepared”, not take the complete contents of a Bear Grylls-approved survival kit to work with you!
There’s London prepared, then there’s Northumberland prepared…
Besides, it’s not the full contents of my field kit. I left out the saw, machette, shelter, first aid kit, cooking equipment, signal flares, gps, and kitchen sink.
No bag of urine? for “emergency consumption”?
At 1kg per litre? No thanks, I’ll just stick to munching on yellow snow. Just think of it as a Bear Grylls Slushy.
Mint.
Aren’t you forgetting the ice saw and fishing line in case you get stuck without dinner?
I work in a pet shop, and it wouldn’t take me long to rig up a roasting spit on the gas heater if the local cafe was shut. Apparently roast guinea pig is quite popular in South America.
Chinchilla casserole is worth a punt.
I think you might be overegging it by suggesting hot water could cause a windscreen to “shatter”. It might crack if its old or youre unlucky but they tend to be built to resist shattering, at least on modern cars.
Always use a jug of warm (not too hot, just comfortable to leave your hand in it) water on my windscreens, have done for years. The neighbours look at me like i’m mad when I do it.
Thermodynamically, you just need to put lukewarm/tepid water on the windscreen to avoid shattering and melt ice effectively – that always works well for me!
plus if you boil it in a kettle you only persuade it to freeze again quicker so by the time you’ve got in the car and got the wipers on you’ve got a new slightly more transparent frozen layer. But I was more pointing out that even boiling water straigt from the kettle shouldn’t do more than cause a crack.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u6P8MQDxmHE
Exactly, an already damaged windscreen may crack. not shatter.
so far in surrey weve had some which just evaporated causing all the extra snow to just turn into liquid so it been fucking long as i wana snowball my man
Since Mr. Mills is fielding some undeserved criticism over on the 3D printing story, I just thought I’d say that I’m liking Chris’ style here. If you can make a piece on winter survival sound entertaining, you must be doing something right.
I would suggest winter tyres where ever you live, especially when they temps get below 7c and especially freezing temps. Summer tyres and even all season tyres are not designed for these sort of temperatures. Heres a ‘not very scientific but you get the idea’ video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=elP_34ltdWI
sounds good,pity some of us are landscape maintence monkeys who have to keep big office sites safe and usable for those who dont use a flake of snow as an exscuse for skiveing.
the part about tyres being let down a bit,means just that,not half yer tyre pressure,you should not need to reinflate just to be able to drive safely,if your having to reinflate,you are letting out too much air,its also a good idea on mountain bike tyres in the snow etc,most folk over pressure bike tyres ,
You should absolutely never put WD40 into car locks – it will attract dust and shorten the life of the lock considerably. If graphite doesn’t keep the water out then use a lock de-icer (very expensive alcohol in a bottle with nozzle applicator) as this will evaporate without leaving residue.
As an aside – when I was a kid working on a garage forecourt in Germany we used to offer free hot water to thaw the petrol caps locks when the first freeze hit. Then when they came back a week later and their lock was frozen solid with all that water we’d sell them the very expensive de-icers. One bloke refused to play along and tried to thaw his petrol cap lock with a lighter until the boss went over and asked if he’d like to borrow a hand grenade instead.