Leslie Horn - 

Playbook is a stupid skeezy app that lets you brag to your bros about your hookups, inserting ratings and degrading commentary along the way. What’s not to love?

So, we thought this was a joke at first. We looked up the Whois record, fully expecting it to be registered to Frucci or something, and instead discovered that this app is a real thing, made by a real guy, who is of course a virgin, and will never ever ever ever get laid. At least not if he tells anyone that he made this piece of shit. Anyway, we called the guy on the Whois record, who turned out to actually be one of the creators Chet Chad, Dave, a first-year computer science student at the University of Michigan to ask him why god why. Here’s what he had to say for himself:

Gizmodo: So is this a joke?

Meathead: I still haven’t decided. (Editor’s note: aasdfsadf???) The sexual conquest is a caricature of what we’re going for. (Editor’s note: see above.) It’s a private social network that allows guys to communicate—and girls—what they wouldn’t over Facebook. The features look worse than they are. We are looking to shift that language to be less controversial.

Editor’s Note: You should have just said this was a joke.

Gizmodo: Are you guys in a fraternity?

Einstein: We aren’t, but a lot of our friends who are in fraternities helped us write the copy. Our team wouldn’t have much to add. We’re all first years. We’re all studying computer science engineering.

Editor’s note: You are giving computer science majors a bad name. Also: get new friends.

Giz: What did your female friends think?

Casanova: Mixed responses. Some of them said they’d be okay with it if it’s more gender neutral.

Editor’s note: So what you’re really saying is that you don’t have any female friends.

Giz: Does your mum know about the app?

Virgin: (Pause, chuckle) Yeah. Our mums called us. One of my partner’s mums called all of us and told us we’re really really bright kids and of all the things we could be working on this is the last thing she’d want us to be doing.

Editor’s note: Two years ago, you would’ve been soooo grounded.

Giz: Are you guys virgins?

I’m waiting til marriage. I don’t know about the other three guys.

Editor’s note: Just lie. Lie!

Well, that clears things up. This piece of crap—seriously, it isn’t even a very good app—exists because 19- and 20-year old university freshers are totally clueless. But they should take a hint, because a) there is no way Angelina Jolie agreed to the use of her likeness on this app. And b) come on, ew. Oh, and one final piece of advice: Nobody uses their real phone number when registering domains. [PlayBook via TechCrunch]

Updated with note from Gizmodo UK editor, Kat Hannaford: As you may or may not know, as part of our agreement with our American counterpart Gizmodo, we can syndicate as many or few of their posts as possible. I like to think we get it right most of the time, choosing relevant posts for our UK readers, but occasionally we do get it wrong. This is one of those times, and as the comments suggest, it has no business being here on our UK site. We’ve recently hired two new after-hours editors who syndicate posts from the US site (we tend to post UK-centric news during UK work hours), and are still working through the kinks.

Apologies if this post offended anyone.