Now that 95 per cent mortgages are back in fashion again, you'd only need to put down £85m to get yourself in this astonishing house in London's Mayfair, complete with 21 bedrooms, pool, sauna, a garage that can take four limos, a lift and seven reception rooms. For all your receptionists.
It's not perfect, though. It's a terrace so you'll be able to hear nextdoor's music, and there's a huge garden, which will mean you might have to get a strimmer. Might be a bit of a pain to manage. Here are some of the highlights.
Amazing kitchen. You could heat eight saucepans of beans simultaneously in that and there's more than enough workspace for a toaster. It'd do. Convenient for the local Tesco Metro too. Maybe put in a cheeky offer of £249,995. [Zoopla via Huffington Post]