The Dangers of Dating a Butterphone

By Ashley Feinberg on at

So you're out at a bar when you find yourself talking to the person of your dreams. You exchange numbers, and the next morning, after carefully crafting your first sober communication, you await a response. Your phone vibrates. You look down, eyes opened wide. And then—there it is, burning your eyes like a slap in the face. Green chat bubbles.

No, it's not an Android; you've stumbled upon a butterphone, and College Humor has wonderful depiction of the moral dilemma that follows. Texting character limits? No GPS? Still struggling with T9? Nothing to distract their fidgety hands except session on Snake? Yep, they've got it all. And the worst part? They'll never have the charger you need—the worst kind of nightmare. When Meatloaf said he wouldn't do "that," he was talking about butterphones.

Then again, the real joke here is that this is the sort of thing that encapsulates everything that's wrong with a certain section of tech lovers. [College Humor]