Are you sitting comfortably? You may find what I'm about to tell you distressing. The confectionist formally known as Kraft Foods (now trading under the name Mondalez International), the American company that now controls Cadbury, has changed the recipe for the Creme Egg. And it's...not good.
Rather than using Cadbury's Dairy Milk chocolate in this year's sticky treat, it's been swapped out for the chalkier, less-sweet chocolate you find in American confectionery products.
"It's no longer Dairy Milk. It's similar, but not exactly Dairy Milk. We tested the new one with consumers. It was found to be the best one for the Creme Egg, which is why we've used it this year," the company told The Sun newspaper.
"The Creme Egg has never been called the Cadbury's Dairy Milk Creme Egg. We have never played on the fact that Dairy Milk chocolate was used."
To add insult to tastebud-injury, the Creme Egg gift boxes now come one egg short of a half-dozen, with just five per packet, and totally missing the joke of there being a half-dozen regular eggs in a savoury egg carton. The company blames rising commodity prices, but we reckon Slugworth has finally infiltrated the Creme Egg factory.
Amendment: This article originally attributed the recipe change to Kraft Foods. But since a de-merger in 2012, Cadbury has been controlled by Mondelez International. The two now trade as separate companies. The article has been updated to reflect this.