Toot toot! I have discovered the peak of transporting greatness and it is a hot tub tug boat. HotTug is both real and as incredible as it sounds, a hot tub that doubles as a boat.
The HotTug fits 6 to 8 people, contains 1,800 litres of water, and is objectively amazing. Dutch designer Frank de Bruijn created the machine after recognising that the world of leisure boating had a tug-boat-sized hole. It comes with a stainless steel stove and a glass-fibre and wood body. Don't worry about coming too close to the stove in your bathing suit; it has been designed to stay cool enough to avoid burning passengers.
It is available to rent in select destination like Copenhagen and London.
If you know, in your heart, of a better way to spend a Saturday night than this, please let me know. Just kidding, you're a liar:
The slogan for the TugBoat is "unexpected freedom." As it should be.
Images via Tub Boat