While you scoff your three Mars bar Easter eggs in one horrifying 45-minute window of self-hate this Sunday, the Queen will, of course, be enjoying something a little more classy from her authorised sweet makers. A 1.8kg hand-finished monster will be broken and slowly fed to her by a gloved assistant.
The chocolatiers at posh sweetie company Prestat have produced a little video showing how its upper class eggs are created, revealing that the one packed off to the Queen will have been "very lovingly" hand foiled by a selection of ladies and gentlemen in hairnets to ensure she's only chomping on the cleanest and most hairless chocolate.
Here's how the Queen's baby-sized egg is made:
[SPOILER] Tiny eggs and bunny rabbits are said to be inside. Probably chocolate ones, although with the royal family being quite keen on the old blood sports, perhaps it's stuffed with actual dead rabbits for her to have someone gut and boil up for later for a detoxifying zero-carb tea?
The convoluted process involves Prestat then getting a letter from the Queen telling them how much she liked it, and she ought to, what with them being the chocolate makers bearing the Appointment to Her Majesty the Queen stamp of pre-approval. [Telegraph]