Become the Bromley Batman: The Gear and Gadgets You Need to Fight Crime

By James O Malley on at

As we reported this morning the Bromley Batman is on the loose in South London, helping out those in need by, umm, tripping up muggers and putting them in ninja locks. But what if you want to join in the fun and become a masked vigilante?

While we really, really wouldn't exactly recommend it (lots of working unsociable hours and legally very, very sketchy), we'd also think it was kinda sorta pretty cool if Britain had its own Justice League ready to go. So here's some of the things that you might need to get started.


Before you can become a superhero, you need to make sure you've got your secret lair worked out. Where else are you going to put your Bat-computer?

Luckily a company called FauxBooks will sort you out. There you can buy a hidden door to mask the entrance to your hideout. Sadly, there isn't any pricing available on their website, which I guess means that it'll probably help if you're an eccentric billionaire too.


OK, so the lair is sorted, but how are you going to get to those in need? Sadly something like the Tumbler might be tricky to get hold of. The second best option might be the bulletproof BMW X5, which is apparently capable of withstanding fire from an AK47, as it is certified with VR6 ballistic protection.

According to the Daily Mail, a normal X5 will cost around £43,000, with the bulletproof version costing an eye-watering £110,000. So try not to get into too many firefights as all of the scuffs on the paintwork might start to get expensive.

Bat Armour

Getting involved with violent criminals is dangerous, so you need to protect yourself with some body armour. Luckily, VestGuard UK is here to help. One of the company's best-sellers is a £775 tactical vest.

This vest can apparently protect you from 6 AK47 bullets, or 2-3 armour piercing rounds from a distance of 15m. Better still, it'll also protect your shoulders, collar and even your Bat-groin.

It also works as a modular design, so you can mix and match exactly how your wear it to meet your superhero needs. They will also throw in a helmet for £140 – though you'll have to add the ears yourself.


So what are you going to do about one of Batman's most iconic weapons? It turns out that making your own Batarangs could be quite straightforward. All you need is an old saw blade, a jigsaw machine, and the balls to make such a brutal-looking implement.

Check out the video below from Grant Thompson to see how to make them. Though be warned: if walking around town in a tactical vest isn't enough to get the attention of Gotham's police department, carrying these in public will probably get you sent straight to Arkham.

Bat-Explosive Gel

One of the most useful tools in the Batman: Arkham series of games is the explosive gel, which be used to both shatter glass and walls, but also to take down enemies with a little forward planning. Unfortunately for aspiring Bat-people, it doesn't really exist in real life.

There is, however, something known as Gelignite, which is similar and is used in mining and demolitions, and was invented by Alfred Nobel. Though according to Wired, it is (surprise!) super dangerous, and can get set off by radio waves and cause headaches. So we presume its utility in fighting crime might not be great.

Bat-Grappling Hook Launcher

How are you going to pursue bad guys at speed? Or tie their legs together as they run away? What you need is a grappling hook gun. Again, unsurprisingly you can't walk into a shop and buy one, but that hasn't stopped homebrew makers. Check out this from Christian Reed, who managed to to put this pneumatic grappling hook together on his own.

On Indestructables he says that "I took the best aspects of many different spud guns to make one of the best possible systems doing my best to avert creating any weak spots and not using any dangerous PVC (which shatters when over pressured and does not work well in the cold)."

Obviously this will probably end up being more useful if you want to be a vigilante in New York than if you live in East Anglia.

Bat Tracker

Oh no! Your nemesis has escaped before you could capture them and returned to their secret hideout. But you can still find them with your Bat Tracker. Over on Amazon US, $109 will get you a Spy Spot tracker, which uses GPS and mobile 2G data to transmit location data. Apparently it has 2.5 weeks battery life too, so will work when tracking the baddies over long distances.

A slightly more practical alternative might be something like Tile. It is a little Bluetooth tag that can be detected by your phone, or anyone else running the Tile app. And all you have to do is login to the Tile app and you can view each tag's last known location. So if they're getting away, glue a tile to a Batarang and throw it at them: you'll be able to follow them wherever they go.

Remote Control Batarang

A good stand-in for this gadget could be a small drone, mounted with a camera  so that you can send it through tight spots to spy. The Pocket Drone can carry a GoPro and will fold up smaller than 7-inch, so will fit nicely on your (umm, XXL) utility belt.

There's GPS built in, so you can send it off on solo missions or you can control it with your Android phone. There's even a follow-me mode for if you want to film your caped crusading.


And finally, what about the all-important cape? Well, you need to be able to glide with it, so without comic book physics, your best bet is a wing suit like in this Red Bull video below.

Website Tony's Wingsuits might be a good place to get your own. There's a tool where you can design your own suit, so you can make sure the colours match whatever your intended superhero persona might be.


Now you should be ready to take to the streets and fight crime! Just make sure you think of a bad-ass superhero name, and be sure to ignore anyone who says that the best way to improve society is through education and public health programmes, and through tackling corruption. That's far less fun than putting on tights and beating up muggers.