sex

Leicester City Thai Orgy Football Sex Tape Stars Should Have Followed This Simple Checklist

By Gerald Lynch on at

I'm no PR expert, but every time I plan on going away on holiday for a depraved sex binge (and by "every time I plan on" I mean "instantly dismiss the heinous thought of"), I make sure to check my actions against the following list of no-nos:

  1. Make sure I don't film it
  2. If I insist on filming it, make sure I film it in widescreen
  3. If I insist on filming it in portrait orientation, make sure I don't share it
  4. If I insist on sharing it make sure I don't share the footage with mates who will sell it on to a national newspaper
  5. If I Insist on sharing it with mates who will sell it to a national newspaper, make sure I'm not a professional footballer
  6. If I'm a professional footballer, make sure the country I visit for my sex binge isn't also one of my club's sponsors
  7. If the country I visit for my sex binge is one of my club's sponsors, remember not to use racial slurs directed at the people performing sex acts on me in the video I've chosen to film in portrait and share with mates who will sell it onto a national newspaper

Leicester City players James Pearson, Tom Hopper and Adam Smith obviously didn't make any such checklist before heading off to Thailand for their post-season blowout, with the Daily Mirror picking up footage of their ill-judged off-pitch behaviour.

Filming themselves partaking in a group sex act in Thailand (the Premier League club is partnered with the Tourism Authority of Thailand, with the trip being part of a goodwill effort from Leicester's Thai owners), Hopper calls one woman "fucking minging", while another man offscreen refers to one of the local women as "slit-eye". To add insult to injury, the whole thing is filmed in portrait. For shame.

The players have now been "indefinitely suspended," and will likely also be sent on courses titled "How to Best Use a Smartphone Camera", "Racism: A Beginner's Guide", and "How Not to Look Like a Complete Knob on Social Media". Should you want to kick your week off with a bang, the uncensored clip can be found at the source. [Deadspin]