If you're going to fiddle whilst Rome burns, you may as well do it in style. Taxi-Stroke-Delivery service Gett has announced a new service that will let London's deliver champagne straight to their door.
Of course, this isn't for the likes of you, as it only works in the posh bits of the capital: Knightsbridge, Chelsea, The City, Belgravia, Chelsea, Kensington, Clerkenwell and Shoreditch. The booze will be supplied by Amathus and deliveries could be as quick as ten minutes. That's right - whether you've just closed a deal to sell a luxury flat to a corrupt oligarch, or are celebrating the social cleansing of inner London, an appropriately decadent beverage will be only a few taps on an app away.
Starting tomorrow, a bottle of Veuve Clicquot can be delivered with a couple of "flutes" for just the cost of £50 plus the chance of being treated sympathetically after the revolution. Though sadly for the vulture classes deliveries will be made by "knowledge boys", who are trainee taxi drivers on motorbikes, meaning that as you will have to look a working person in the eye before drinking to forget them.
Ultimately, it is a bit of a promotional wheeze to get some press for a taxi app that is trailing Uber. As the press release points out, most of Gett's business is in taxis - though the company is looking to deliveries too. But I can't help but wonder if it is a sign that the world has run out of first world problems to solve - this is almost as tenuous as "Washboard", an app which would post stupid customers coins to use in the laundrette. (No, it really existed).