Tech startup Humai claims it's going to be able to bring the dead back to life within 30 years, by creating realistic AI versions of ourselves that'll be able to tell our children to turn off their sodding iPads long after we're gone.
"We want to bring you back to life after you die" is the headline boast, with the company somehow planning to use AI to create a version of your personality that could live on forever, in what sounds like a modern upgrade of the cryogenic suspension scheme.
"We're using artificial intelligence and nanotechnology to store data of conversational styles, behavioral patterns, thought processes and information about how your body functions from the inside-out," the company adds, as if the lack of "nanotechnology" might be the answer to why current-gen AI is literally rubbish.
The reality, given how terrible AI bots are at the moment, is you'll be brought back to life as some sort of semi-interactive Turing Test failure inside an app, surrounded by adverts for bereavement counselling services, and only able to communicate should the conversation head off in the direction of the checkboxes on the questionnaire you filled in before dying.
Your body will still be burned to ash and sprinkled in the games aisle of your favourite branch of PC World in accordance with your final wishes, so the physical part of you is still going to end.
Humai's CEO told PopSci that he'd like to think he can make death an "option" only taken by the poor, though, explaining: "I don’t think of it as fighting death. I think of it as making death optional. I personally can’t imagine why anyone would want to die but I respect their wishes."
Even if Humai's AI plans come to fruition and a nanotech version of your personality does become self-aware on a computer somewhere, you'll face quite the lonely future. No offence or anything, but it's unlikely that some random stranger 200 years from now is going to want to talk to you about whether you like the new Captain America trailer. The AI you will, ironically, probably spend eternity wishing it was dead. [Humai via Techradar]