It's that day again. The day when even the stuff The Poke steals off Reddit seems funny in comparison to the first-pass shit being peddled by the social media managers of the world in the name of humour and user engagement. Oh god no, it's happening again. The boss is trying to be funny.
Pirate Bay Green Mode
We had an internal debate this morning over whether this nightmare on TorrentFreak about the Pirate Bay "going green" was a joke or not, such is the not-funny nature of it plus the fact that it's based on the black-screen energy saving concept briefly fashionable five years ago. We decided it was probably meant as a joke. Shame on you, TorrentFreak, you usually reliable bastion of serious and well-researched file-sharing news.
Domimaker Remote Slice
Well done in part, Domino's, for doing something that takes the piss out of execrable smart/remote/IoT technology, but next year just use the money you've wasted getting some people to make this on simply giving every customer a bit of extra spicy meat with their next order. That's the only true way to increase future brand loyalty.
Duolingo Smart Pillow
Someone please hold it over my face until either I stop wiggling or April Fool's day has ended.
Again, well done to Cheapflights for accurately criticising a large chunk of their potential audience via the invention of fictional flight service Hipster Air, but actually detonating an explosive device on a passenger jet would've (a) got more publicity for the brand and (b) been funnier. Okay, maybe not. But seriously, should've just got Terrorist Selfie Man to wear a t-shirt.
Also saying you're an idiot is Firebox, which has listed the iDodge for sale for £50. Given the piles of equally risible stuff it actually sells for real, the arrival of a smartphone case that "Warns you when when you might hit something without your eyes leaving your screen" is hardly a surprise.
This is one of the weirdest of the day, sent to us by "online peer-to-peer (P2P) mortgage lender Landbay" who commissioned a joke about DroneHome -- a system of pop-up housing and business premises that might be ferried into place by drone. The announcement goes on for ever and the artwork looks all serious, making it resemble the exact opposite of a joke.
This one's actually quite good. Short and to the point. Believable. Well made. So let's not dwell on it.
Everyone likes Pornhub's regular jokes, as hardcore porn is always funny. Ha ha! Look! What even is that fluid? On this momentous day in comedy history, the porn site has completely rebranded its front page as Cornhub (pictured top) -- we won't provide a link, as tomorrow it'll be back to not particularly hilarious clips of women choking on things instead of today's corn-based sex puns.
Tennent's Lager has been wasting resources on the internet for years, winning a meagre 1,100 subscribers to its corporate YouTube channel by posting adverts and failed attempts at achieving viral mass. Those 1,100 people were alerted to the existence of the Tennent's Rapid service this morning, via a video, currently sitting on 90 views, of a drone delivering some beer to a man. Drones delivering unlikely things = 2016's hot comedy trend. Imagine a Clarks drone delivering sandals! A Ginsters drone delivering pasties!
Because I typed "Ginsters" up there, I looked up Ginsters on the internet to see if there's an apostrophe in its name or not because, believe it or not, I do care despite what it looks like, and would you believe it; it's done the same joke as well. Ginsters Instant. Ginstant. I hate this job. Please sack me, Gerald. I doubt I'll be OK by Monday this time.