Market traders should be allowed to start selling things by the pound and the ounce again, like they did before that meddling European train full of gravy said we had to go metric.
That's according to the British Weights and Measures Association, a very real trade body that says men who have a way with a paper bag have been asking if it's OK to ditch the metric system now we're officially in a state of bureaucratic war with the European Union. After all, those suits in Brussels have got more important things to worry about now than whether your gran was supplied with an illegally advertised metric quantity of potatoes rather than a compliant metric unit equivalent.
Warwick Cairns of the BWMA said: "In 2000, to comply with European legislation, the Government made it a criminal act for a greengrocer to sell a pound of bananas. We thought this was outrageous then. We think it outrageous now. And with our exit from the EU, the legal basis of compulsory metrication will be repealed. We believe it's now time to restore freedom of choice."
Maybe we can then unite around the real crime of the grocer's apostrophe. [Telegraph]