Doritos Plans "Low Crunch" Crisps for the Ladies

By Gary Cutlack on at

The current boss of brand behemoth PepsiCo has revealed a plan to attack the difficult world of what women eat when they allow themselves to, revealing that the company's Doritos crisps line is shortly to expand to feature several items created specifically for the ladies.

The problem, PepsiCo thinks, is that women don't like guzzling and crunching and licking their way through snacks in public as much as men, so, amazingly, they're working on less crunchy versions of their popular amalgamated corn snack specifically for the female eaters.

The reveal of this horrendous innovation can be traced back to an interview given by PepsiCo's CEO Indra Nooyi, where she explained that another idea behind the new crisps is to have less of the flavouring stick to the expensively maintained fingers of the classy lady consumer, plus they'll be in smaller bags so they can easily fit in a purse. Might as well stick a photo of Tom Hardy on the pack while you're at it.

Here's the... science... behind the product, according to Nooyi: "...as you watch a lot of the young guys eat the chips, they love their Doritos, and they lick their fingers with great glee, and when they reach the bottom of the bag they pour the little broken pieces into their mouth, because they don’t want to lose that taste of the flavor, and the broken chips in the bottom. Women would love to do the same, but they don’t. They don’t like to crunch too loudly in public. And they don’t lick their fingers generously and they don’t like to pour the little broken pieces and the flavor into their mouth."

Hence special crisps for them and their bloody needs. We couldn't have made this up. It's all at Freakonomics. Leave the comments there if you're a woman, not here. [Freakonomics via Mirror]


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