Something strange is going on in Gateshead. The local council has stepped in to address rumours that people have been spreading, with conspiracy theories about the powers and dangers of the local street lights leaving residents confused and even more scared to go out at night to the off licence than usual.
Some people have been distributing fake news regarding the technological status of the lampposts in the area, it seems, with the council taking the extreme measure of listing several things that the lampposts don't do. They don't, for example, feature high-end 5G test technology the government is secretly trialling in Gateshead, nor have they been causing undue levels of insect death or human nosebleeds.
Here's the council's full statement on the powers -- or not -- of its current generation of lamppost:
- Gateshead Council DOES NOT use 5G technology in any of its street lights, or in any other capacity. It has never done so.
- The street lights in Gateshead will not give you cancer.
- The street lights will not induce miscarriages in pregnant women, or cause insomnia, or nosebleeds, and they are not killing all the birds and insects.
- Gateshead Council is NOT carrying out secret government trials in 5G technology via our street lights.
So stop saying that if you stand under a Gateshead lamppost for too long your hair will fall out or your YouTube videos will load quicker, as its freaking the council's nuts out. [Gateshead Council]