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Emails From the Command-Line: Backing Up and Checking Out

They say all good things must come to an end, and they’re right. It started last week, when the boss asked if I could make a home visit to sort out his Wi-Fi; his wife’s email account (goodness knows why), and his children’s iTunes stuff. He lives near Brighton, so I thought it would make a nice day out. Read More >>

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Emails From the Command-Line: Business Development Assurance Blah Blah-Whatever

I’m always wary of emails sent with the ‘Important’ flag; especially at 6pm. This one's from HR Susan, and has a subject labelled ‘Urgent’. OK, message received loud and clear...what fresh hell am I about to face this time? Read More >>

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Emails From the Command-Line: Outsourcing...Me?

Last week, the boss called me in. “Ah, Ethan! Great new things are a-happening. We’re cutting costs and improving services m’boy.” Eyes to ceiling, deep breath... “What’s that then, Sir?” I ask in my usual belligerent, yet very caring manner. Read More >>

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Emails From the Command-Line: But We Don't Have a Helipad?

Glorious sunshine yesterday; the park was full of happy people not moaning about work, and instead swapping insights about that night's much-anticipated football match, England vs. err...somebody else. It must have been an important match I figured, as the bosses told us there was to be free beer and pizza in the boardroom for anyone interested. Free beer – how could I refuse? Read More >>

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Emails From the Command-Line: The Lost USB Stick

Saw my first grey hair this morning. That's what my colleagues at work have done to me, with questions like "what's that noise that sounds like a fan, coming out of my computer?" Read More >>

tech support
Emails From the Command-Line: A Greek Investment

Glorious sunshine intrudes through our office venetian blinds, and taking a quick look at the server, it appears only half the staff are in today. Jolly good; I'll see if I can find the keys to the roof terrace and work up there. With a cold beer. And some crisps. Read More >>

tech support
Emails From the Command-Line: Olympics For Rent

My new Tulisa calendar tells me we're in for a four-day weekend in a couple of weeks, which is great news (apart from the fact that I'll have to turn over the May page, which is the best month of the year by far). There's then a 3-week section at the end of July too, marked: "No Work. Olympics." Read More >>

tech support
Emails From the Command-Line: The 7th Floor

I was right; people wandering around the office measuring things is never a good sign. Still in denial mode re. the fundraiser event last week, and avoiding Sophia (don't you hate it when people start laughing as you walk in the room and you've no idea why?) I brace myself for another day of young creative types waving their brand new iPads trying to get it to print. And playing Angry Birds. Read More >>

tech support
Emails From the Command-Line: Is This a P45 Situation?

I'm staying put in my little office today, for more than one reason. It's Wednesday, and I still can't quite figure out what happened at last week's charity fundraiser that Sophia invited the IT department (well, me and Colin) to. Read More >>

tech support
Emails From the Command-Line: "I Need an iPhone 5 by Tomorrow"

Only three days to go until the charity fundraiser the ladies in our copywriting department invited me to. I'm still trying to ignore the fact they're probably only buttering me up so I'll circumnavigate our company's strict IT policies and install Spotify on their computers. Still, the thought spurs me into arriving at work on time, and I didn't scowl at my fellow London Underground commuters once. Honest. Read More >>

tech support
Emails From the Command-Line: Passcodes to Hell

Wednesday. Again. When will I learn that the wine at the back of the fridge in my local Pricedropper, marked '£2.99 Use by Dec 2011' is not necessarily a good idea. I'm not feeling too bright this morning, so I sneak into the building 'round the back via the goods entrance. From here I can get to my office, bypassing reception, the cafeteria and the directors' offices. It takes ages and involves many stealth-like manoeuvres, but it's worth it. Sitting down, I wait for things to come into focus. Knock knock. "Oh for goodness sake," I sigh. Read More >>

tech support
Emails From the Command-Line: Cordless Phones and Brainless Bosses

Incognito IT manager Ethan Net kickstarts the first of his weekly columns with this classic PEBKAC case... Monday. Again. Bloody hell. Another five days to wade through, before I don't have to battle with a broken computer and its damaged user for two whole days. So, what will it be this morning? Well, working at this large media company, I've learnt to expect anything and everything. Don't get me wrong: the people here are great; most are fairly switched on (well, they can dress themselves and everything.) And then there are those who get a very special mention. Read More >>

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