"Hey Matt", I heard a familiar voice behind me. It was Pete, rudely interrupting a veritable feast, served on the finest flatware money can buy. Okay, so it was a slightly floppy BLT sandwich on a paper plate, but nonetheless. Read More >>
Featured comment by ACAB:
"No, one or two perhaps but generally No. I was a tutor Constable. One of my probationers got involved in a tussle with a drunk and headbutted him whic..." More »
Starving, I was, after a horrendously long morning where every attempt at getting some food down my gullet was scuppered by chance. The timing was so bad, that I decided to do an experiment. Read More >>
It's godawfully early in the morning, and I've been up for several hours already. The one good think about ridiculous shift patterns, I suppose, isn't necessarily that you get any better at waking up at all silly hours of the day, but that you do get better at having at least some of your faculties when you're operating in a sleepy daze. Read More >>
Featured comment by grrlscientist:
"*bingo*
i am an american expat & a sexual assault survivor & i absolutely refuse to ever return to the USA -- for any reason -- because i r..." More »
"You've got to be... I mean... On my way," I blurt into my radio, as we're called to a silent alarm at a warehouse for the third time in a shift. Read More >>
Featured comment by DeltaWhiskey:
"Ohhh - you posh SC&O boys with all your fancy "doughnuts". How the other half live, eh? You probably have pain au chocolat too and pronounce them ..." More »
If you thought 'having a case of the Mondays' was bad, you should try dragging yourself out of bed at 4am to make it to work and into uniform for 6am after four days off. Our shift patterns have always been a bit nutty, but the pattern we are on at the moment is actually pretty decent -- in theory, we're six days on, four days off. In practice, we're often six days on, one day on secondment or similar, and three days off. The upside is that we do, indeed, occasionally get four delicious days off on the trot. Read More >>
A late Thursday afternoon just before my shift was due to finish, I was hiding from the rain under a roof outside a large shopping mall in our borough. 'Hey', I figured. 'The tax payers get the reassurance of a friendly-looking police officer in a highly visible location, and I get the reassurance that despite being out on foot patrol on a soggy day, I get to stay dry. It's a win-win, right?' Read More >>
Featured comment by gerg:
"There are a lot of accounts of this, particularly from small town provincial police (who presumably haven't been well informed of the matter) although..." More »
It was going to be such a ridiculously easy arrest. Only a shoplifter - I've done hundreds of those, right? Besides, the shopping centre where the arrest was to take place is right across the road from the police station, and whilst we're not meant to 'march prisoners', if this was a reasonable chap, we'd just cross the street together, and not wait for 20 minutes for the busy caged van. What could be easier? Read More >>
Featured comment by jibberjabba:
"Do you know colleagues who have? If you do (or indeed if you don't), what do you think of them?
Are they at all representative of your job?" More »
After an absolutely ridiculous morning of doing blue-light runs from one end of the borough to the other, it seemed like all the customers had decided to give it a rest for the day; as soon as I sat down for lunch on this particular blue-skied Saturday, my radio fell silent, and for once I was able to just sit, chill, eat my sandwich, and enjoy a cup of tea. Read More >>
In facing the sky, I observe that the heavens are heavy of mind and pregnant with rain. "A perfect day", I mumble to myself, "to be stuck on goddamn foot patrol duty." Read More >>
Featured comment by mattyb:
"As a follow up, the actual statement the school that my kids go is as follow.
"After taking police advice, any mobile phones used within the school..." More »
I'm in the driver's seat of a BMW area car for the occasion, on the slowest shift I can remember in a very, very long time. Sure, we sometimes have extremely busy shifts, but even a quiet shift has a steady trickle of jobs to do, most of the time. Read More >>
I'm sitting on the number 4 bus; minding my own business; eating a Bounty bar, and catching up on the tech world. That morning, my iPad had informed me in no uncertain terms that I should download the newest monthly issue of Wired, and who am I to deny the recommendations from what functions as my brain most of the time? Read More >>
Featured comment by rapheal:
"well speaking as a tradesman who for the last 35 years has worked in private houses of all sorts and business, I think matt is spot on
i have worked ..." More »
Featured comment by Matt Delito:
""did this distract a couple of coppers with better things to do from attending something more important"
Nope - that's exactly what we are here for..." More »
"We've had a phonecall from Church Lane claiming they have intruders on the property; is anyone free to go take a look?" the CAD operator said, and followed up with a quick outline of the incident and the address. Read More >>
It's mid-afternoon on an altogether rather lovely Wednesday, and I have that Friday feeling. That is what weird shift patterns will do to you -- sometimes you get 'that Friday feeling' on a Monday morning, after a long Sunday late turn, which is utterly bizarre, but not entirely unpleasant either. Read More >>
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