10 Bizarre and Horrifying Sex Patents (NSFW, Obviously)
We scoured Google's patent database to find the most absurd – and often wildly dangerous – design ideas filed by some of history's most misguided engineers.
patents
Latest content
British Rail Once Patented a Flying Saucer
Signalling failures would still mean you'd be late for your commute to Mars.
Can Apple Make Gesture Input Not Suck?
The same way it makes most things not suck by arriving to the party late and flustered yet cooler than everyone else?
Apple Patents a Phone That Bends (You Know, Like the iPhone 6 Plus)
It just...bends.
Apple Patents Galaxy Note-Troubling Wireless Stylus
Not likely to be compatible with Samsung devices, we-thinks.
Report: Bose is Going to Return to the Apple Store
Apple and Bose seem to have stopped squabbling and the two will play nicely together again.
Apple Patents Method to Make iPhones Fall Like a Cat
It's a system for your iPhone to detect when it's in free fall and to act accordingly to stop it from smashing.
Nintendo Patents Emulator That Could Bring Mario to Smartphones
And aeroplane seats. At some point in the future. Possibly.
Pay-As-You-Smoke E-Cigarette Sounds Like the Worst Idea Ever
It's the smoking equivalent of in-app purchases.
Apple Digital Newspaper Patent Sounds Like a Roll-Up, Flexible Kindle
Apple's not the first company to show an interest in this area -- both Plastic Logic and LG have each shown off prototypes similar to what's described in Apple's patent.
Apple's Been Playing With an iPad UI That Assigns "Weight" to Files Based on Data Size
It seems the sort of thing ousted Scott Forstall would have pushed for.
Airbus Patents VR Headsets to Make Flying Suck Less
Airbus wants to use virtual reality to take you out of the grim reality of cheap flights.
Apple Now Has a Design Patent for its Giant Glass Cube
So now Samsung can't build its own giant-transparent-cube store.
Apple Patents Permanently Deformable Flexible Display
A flexible screen that might actually flex beneath your fingertips.
Apple Patent Helps Find Your Car Even When You Can't Get a Signal
An invention for the absent-minded among us.
Google Patents Tech-on-the-Inside Hardware Update of Google Glass
Minimise the chances of a public beating.
