"Sexy" Transformers Costumes are Neither Big Nor Clever

By Jack Tomlin on at

There are certain words that just shouldn't go together; words that are so diametrically opposed that a chill can run down the spine on hearing them. In this case I present the phrase "Sexy Transformers Costume".

I really wish I were making it up, but alas, there exists such a thing – three in all! – as Sexy Transformer Costumes (yargh I said it again!). They are being flogged over at 80's Tees and come in "Sexy Optimus Prime", "Sexy Megatron" and "Sexy Bumblebee" varieties. Great! (oh wait, sarcasm is hard to interpret on screen, ahem, NOT GREAT!)

Somewhere out there, this news is making a grown man weak at the knees. Knowing that he can order one of these to buy for his girlfriend that he may perhaps have in the foreseeable future. What size does he buy though? Maybe he should buy them in Small, Medium and Large all at the same time – because, gosh, wouldn't it look ridiculous if your lady couldn't pre-coitally squeeze herself into the Optimus Prime costume she is being goaded into wearing. [80's Tees]