New Nuclear Sub Artful Plops into the Sea Beside Cumbria

By Gary Cutlack on at

The most phallic object yet created by man has launched, with our new nuclear submarine protector Artful now sitting in its dock at Barrow-in-Furness. It's 97m long and weighs 7,400 tonnes, so let's hope none of those workmen get their toes under it.

The Artful is the third of seven Astute-class nuclear subs being built by BAE Systems for the Navy. It'll now sit in its dock for tests, before undergoing sea trials next year. Then it'll be off to hunt for treasure and giant squids while occasionally pointing its threatening missiles at troublesome nations. Here's an infographic all about it:




Good news about the 18,000 sausages aboard. That's 18 sausages per man, per week. Having Sausages for dinner most days must go some way toward alleviating the boredom of 10 weeks stuck in a tube. No mention of if it's got Wi-Fi or not, though. It must have.