How To Make "Soccer" Popular in America: Play it With Giant Slingshots

By Andrew Liszewski on at

Leave it to Joerg Sprave, the internet's favourite slingshot builder to finally come up with a guaranteed way to make all Americans love the game of football. Instead of the players being limited to only using their feet, they should all be allowed to carry this football-firing slingshot that can easily propel a ball the length of the field.

With a built-in scope it should vastly improve shot accuracy over what your feet can muster. And to keep injuries to a minimum, all that would be needed is a new rule allowing goalies to carry and play with riot shields.