Canadian Police Want You to Respond to Sexts With These Insane Replies

By Ashley Feinberg on at

It's been a red-letter past few years for both teens and sexters alike. So it's not surprising that, today, we find ourselves in the era of the sext-addled teen. But the Ontario Provincial Police think they might be able to stop teens at the source with a potent combination of app-based sarcasm and "keep calm and carry on" jokes. Bless their hearts.

The app, dubbed Send This Instead, boasts 57 "humorous and sarcastic" potential dick-pic-responses that, as you might have guessed, teens can "send instead." While some might argue that responding with the sort of message even Nancy Reagan could get behind would only provoke deviant sexters more, the Ontario Provincial Police say go for it.

Canadian Police Want You To Respond to Sexts With These Insane Replies

Among the various, free-to-download phrases, you will find:

  • I'm going to say what your mother should have—NOPE.
  • Save the bandwidth, download a life.
  • Is it possible to get an STD from a TXT cause this conversation is making me itchy. [Ed. note: No. It is not.]
  • Wow, enjoy jail.

And last but certainly not least,

  • That would violate both my data and dating plans, neither of which include you.

It's certainly a noble effort, and to the Ontario Provincial Police's credit, they do acknowledge that "it's not going to solve sexting." Still, considering that unsolicited sexters are generally looking for a reaction of any kind, ignoring any rogue penises that pop up on your home screen is still probably the best bet. You know, unless you're into that. [Send This Instead via Betabeat]