Older readers might remember the Cold War horror videos of the 1970s and early 1980s, which convinced a generation of seven-year-olds that the jet plane flying overhead was probably a nuclear bomb about to wipe out Bodmin and therefore their homes, turning them and the dog into dust. This generation's thing for children to be scared of? Overseas random terrorist gun attacks.
That's the focus of Run Hide Tell; an epic four-minute production by the Counter Terrorism Police, which advises the nation on what to do should some random nutjob start shooting up the hotel pool when in a place where dodgy foreign people are. The basic advice is to run away, as the title suggests, then do the other things. Don't be a hero, as even if you've had so much to drink you think you're bulletproof, you're not bulletproof. Flaky skin is not armour.
Here, if you can take the potential horror, is the film:
We were hoping it might be funny, but it's not funny. Scott Wilson, who's directing the protect and prepare strategy, said: "We want people to think of this in the same way they do the safety film airlines show before take-off. They don't expect anything bad to happen but it is a sensible safety precaution to show people what to do."
See you all in Cumbria this year, then. [YouTube]
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