Argos's Shower Curtain Tablet Case Will Definitely Be Used For Shopping And Not Porn

By Holly Brockwell on at

In an unusual approach to Black Friday, Argos has unveiled "shopping-enabled shower curtains to help customers bag a bargain."

What this actually means is that 100 lucky folks who turn up to one of Argos's busiest Black Friday stores – namely Gateshead Metrocentre, Leicester Belgrave Gate, Coventry Gallagher, Doncaster Wheatley Centre and Leeds Headrow – will walk away with a free but probably quite rubbish shower curtain with "built-in pockets for tablets and mobile phones."

You could achieve a similar effect by duct taping a document wallet to your existing shower curtain, but that's not the point, is it? The point is to be able to watch porn in the shower to be able to shop on Black Friday without missing any deals.

The shower's not even on, FFS

The justification for this completely sincere and not-at-all-publicity-stuntish product is that Argos is expecting the most web traffic between 6 and 7am on Black Friday (23rd November), which is also when 21% of Brits are apparently in the shower.

The retail chain, famous for popularising internet shopping via the medium of paper catalogues, also surveyed 2,000 people and found that some of them plan to shop from "the loo, bath or shower," from which they have concluded that shower shopping is an actual thing.

Lumping those three very different scenarios in together seems like quite a deliberate mistake, to disguise the fact that no one shops in the shower and that in fact, many Argos products are purchased mid-poo.

Maybe we should call it Brown Friday.