Gatwick's South Terminal is the latest part of our airport infrastructure to be diseased by a stupidly expensive luxury pre-flight seating area, with the aspirational chairs of No1 Lounges taking over another key spot in the departures zone.
It's being backed by flier Norwegian, which will let its higher-tier fliers use it for free, while also allowing its cheaper seat travellers to enter in return for £24 for a three-hour sit in. Everyone else evacuating the country on other airlines can pre-book access for the amazingly high price of £32 per adult, should you be so stressed about mingling with the common people in the communal areas, eating their packed lunches and panicking when the sniffer dogs come round, that you need a luxury waiting area.
There is a self-serve bar in there, though, so if your usual pre-takeoff routine involves getting so drunk you sleep through the entirety of the flight while resting your head on the shoulder of a stranger, it could be a bargain. The food's subsidised too and there are plugs and Wi-Fi. Hang on, it's starting to sound like an OK idea, especially as there's a dress code that states "...themed or fancy dress outfits, clothes with slogans that may cause offense, replica sports kits, beach flip flops, clothing that exposes midriffs or upper thighs, or bare shoulders on men" are not allowed.
So there will be screaming at the door from people who paid for access but are now not allowed in because they're in hen party attire. It could all kick off while while you sit there with half a pint of whisky like James Bond off to shag around Morocco for work. [Business Traveller]