Aldi Prepares for Father's Day With Giant Sausages to Graphically Remind You How You Got Here

By Shabana Arif on at

We've chosen to rise above the dick jokes from here on out, like a turgid member rising from the cottony depths of a pair of boxer-briefs. It's low-hanging fruit; like a wizened scrotal sack losing its war with gravity.

We're embracing similes today instead.

Aldi has announced that it will once again be stocking up its foot-long sausages. That's 12 inches of pork for you to swallow for just £1.99. And if it tastes a little tangy as you're choking it down, that's perfectly normal. The sausages have a touch of South Carolina sauce flavour, which is a mustard-based BBQ sauce.

The supermarket brandished its giant sausage last year as well, after initially introducing it for a limited time in November, 2017.

Just like last year, we'll also see the return of the 16 oz extra thick 'Big Daddy' rump steak for £4.99. It doesn't look like the 1lb Colossal Beef Burger burgers will be rearing their magnificent heads; instead we'll be getting a 1.5kg porchetta joint for £9.99.

So celebrate your dad's contribution to making you with some quality pork this Father's Day, on June 16.[Metro]

Feature image credit: Aldi