Star Wars Day has become an annual tradition on May the fourth, and thanks to capitalism, every annual tradition is now a shopping event. Which means your humble droids at Giz UK have had the arduous task of shopping for hours on end to find you all the coolest, weirdest and most unique Star Wars stuff on the planet.
Well, the stuff that ships to the UK, anyway.
Here's our rundown of the Star Wars loot you need this May the fourth.
1. Actual items from the films, £varies
If there's one way to ensure you never have any financial security, it's getting into buying memorabilia from your favourite movies. Prop Store is great for that, and has a whole load of stuff that was in or is related to Star Wars, from insanely detailed replicas to objects from the sets.
Browse the lot here, but only filter prices by High > Low if you want to feel very poor indeed.
2. TIE fighter desk lamp, £49.99
The coolest way to illuminate your desk and its
post-it notes about buying cat food top-secret moon base construction plans.
It's 60cm tall, so pretty sizeable, and can be posed and adjusted to your heart's content. Also, it's officially licensed -- none of that 'War Stars' nonsense here. [Buy it here].
3. Limited edition collectors' artwork, about £22
These ridiculously colourful and beautiful pieces of officially licensed artwork measure 11 x 14 inches and are based on the original Stormtrooper helmet moulds created by Andrew Ainsworth of Shepperton Design Studios.
They're €24.99 each, which is about £22. [Buy them here.]
4. Sassy Darth Vader notebook, £2.50
Whatever you write in this A5 notebook, the cover will pretty much always be true. Maybe not one to take to meetings with the boss, though. [Buy it here.]
This gorgeous shadow box wall art is printed on 320 GSM super-glossy card using archival-quality ink, then hand-cut and built layer-by-layer to create the 3D diorama effect. It comes in a deep shadow box frame with mount and glass front.
It's available in 9 x 7 inches or 15 x 12, the latter of which costs a fair bit more at £64.99. [Buy it here].
6. Stormtrooper Cheese Knife Set, £29.99
If you've been wondering what your Star Wars viewing parties are missing, it's definitely this. A cheese knife set in the shape of a Stormtrooper helmet with laser etching.
It includes stilton, cheddar and hard cheese knives, plus a cheese fork. Now you can say cheesy things like "Patience you must have, my young parmesan" or even a two-parter: "I love gouda" and "I pecori-no." (Sorry not sorry). [Buy it here].
7. Haynes TIE Fighter Owners' Workshop Manual, £18.99
The ideal present for someone who's into car mechanics and Star Wars, Haynes' official owners' manual promises to be "the most thorough technical guide to the TIE Fighter available," including lots of photos, schematics, CGI artwork and a specially-commissioned cutaway.
The book details the evolution of Sienar Fleet Systems’ twin ion engine space superiority fighter, with everything from early concepts and prototypes to bombers, boarding craft and shuttles. There's also plenty of delicious detail about weapons, defensive systems, pilots, training and gear.
8. Jedi dressing gown, £41.99
Yes, it's a little obvious, but you know you want a big comfy Jedi robe to loaf in.
This one has a tunic sewn in underneath and the requisite two pockets -- assuming you still have two hands -- and a belt. It's only available in one size, but we can't think of a better way to start the day than in cosy cosplay. [Buy it here]
9. Lego Star Wars sets, £varies
Lego has of course prepared a raft of deals for May the fourth, including a free Battle of Hoth - 20th Anniversary Edition set when you spend over £75 on Star Wars goodies (as if it was ever in question). The Tantive IV set is also out on the 4th, a 20th anniversary art print up for grabs with purchases over a certain amount, double VIP points on all Star Wars stuff, and even sale discounts on some Star Wars sets. [Shop here].
10. Star Wars Origami, £16.99
Possibly the only thing cuter than BB-8 is a little foldy paper BB-8 you made yourself. Hopefully without the lighter function, though -- that wouldn't end well.
"Like a Jedi’s training, the Japanese craft origami demands dexterity and patience," explains the blurb. The 10 models detailed inside range in skill level from beginner to master, but you're not allowed to use the force to fold paper -- that's cheating.
The book includes loads of pre-printed paper, so you only need folding skills, not drawing. Handy. [Buy it here].
11. Star Wars candle sets, from £30.99
Ever wondered what an Ewok smells like? Fill your home with the weird and wonderful smells of the Star Wars universe with these bonkers scented candle sets. There are quite a few sets to choose from, including such sensory delights as the inside of a Tauntaun, Yoda's cooking pot and the aroma of Han Solo in Carbonite. [Buy them here].
12. Lightsaber heat change mug, £7.99
This deeply satisfying mug shows a colourful selection of Lightsabers, with the beams appearing as you pour in hot water.
Perfect for anyone who likes their coffee on the dark side. [Buy it here].
13. BB-8 pizza cutter, £6.99
Put the galaxy's cutest little bot to work. Emulating the way BB-8 rolls around, this ingenious pizza cutter is slightly awkward to clean, but it's totally worth it. Bonus points if you make sound effects while slicing up your pie. [Buy it here].
14. Imperial Symbol silk tie, £40
Boss find your lack of formalwear disturbing? Strike back with this or one of the many other subtle-but-nerdy silk Star Wars tie designs in the collection. Your stuffed suit of a manager will be satisfied, and you'll know you're mentally piloting ships for the Galactic Empire while on the clock. [Buy it here].
15. R2-D2 teapot, £26.99
We pretty much wrote this entire article so we could say "R2 tea-2" and we have absolutely no regrets.
It might not make you a cuppa like the obedient droid itself, but this official teapot is at least dishwasher safe, so your house robot can clean it for you. [Buy it here].
Did we miss anything good? What are you buying yourself this Star Wars Day? Let us know in the comments, and of course, May the fourth be with you.