A sad little imaginary bell is tolling for Bremilham Church in Wiltshire, where thieves entered the Guinness-certified smallest operational church in the UK and stole away its 291-year-old bell.
The tiny 10 x 11-foot church only holds one service each year, so it's not exactly a massive inconvenience, but still. Who steals a church bell? Have we already been smashed back into the Bronze age by Brexit and the virus? Local farmer Tom Collins enlightened the BBC with his knowledge, saying: "It's nearly 300 years old and it's gone and we're never going to get it back again. We've lost a little bit of heritage. It would take two or three men to lift it or move it, but once you get it on the floor you can roll it."
Tom knows it rolls because he helped restore the church, if you're wondering, not because he wheeled it off to an eBay purchaser. The thieves were aided by the fact that the church is too small to have a tower for its bell, hence the bell was kept on a stand by the door, sort of asking for it, really. The situation is crying out for a new-bell-for-Bremilham crowdfunding campaign, if you're not busy. Maybe give the police a fortnight to try to find it first, though, before it's melted down and turned into Bronze effigies of Nigel Farage. [BBC]