wtf

Heinz Ice Cream is a Thing Now

By Holly Brockwell on at

Welcome to Hell Summer, where everything is bonkers and every single headline has you asking "is it April Fools again?."

Well, it's not, it's just 2020. And to that end, Heinz the beans people have come up with some truly revolting-sounding ice cream flavours based on their sauce products. Inevitably, they're called Heinz Creamz.

Options include Heinz Ketchup Creamz, Heinz Salad Creamz and Heinz Mayo Creamz, and honestly we're struggling to figure out which one makes us retch the most.

However, because this is 2020 and nothing is easy, you don't get to just go out and buy these weirdy-beardy ice cream flavours, oh no. You have to make them yourself, at home, because then if you think they're disgusting, you only have yourself to blame.

Heinz is selling DIY kits to make the Creamz on its online shopping website Heinz To Home from tomorrow (1st July). Kits cost £15 and include the sauce itself, recipe, golden scoop, golden spoon and of course the (reusable) branded ice cream tub. Annoyingly this means it sounds like you have to purchase multiple kits to try all the flavours, rather than there being any kind of sample set.

However, Heinz says it's at least dead easy to make the ice cream, using just four ingredients and taking only fifteen minutes (not including freezing time, we presume), and they're also putting the recipes free on the website so you can make them with the sauces you already have.

Behold the flavours:

Heinz Ketchup Creamz

Enjoy the unmistakable taste of your favourite Heinz Tomato Ketchup- in a Heinz Creamz! Whip up this surprising sweet treat, laced with all the tomatoey goodness of a squeeze of ketchup. You won’t believe your taste buds when you try this rich and delicious combination. Best topped with a sprinkling of meringue and a swirl of raspberry coulis for the ultimate summer’s day pud.

And vegans need not miss out on the sweet treat of the summer, because Heinz have also developed a recipe for a refreshing Ketchup sorbet too, best topped with a fresh sprig of basil and a drizzle of basil pesto.

Heinz Mayo Creamz

This sweet treat is [seriously] good! The smooth and creamy taste of Heinz [Seriously] Good Mayonnaise whipped into a delicious ice cream. Top with apple and blackberry compote and a layer of crumble to create an indulgent treat.

Heinz Salad Creamz

The tangy taste of Heinz Salad Cream makes it one of Britain’s best loved sauces and now it’s a Heinz Creamz. The zing that we all know and love can be paired with the delicious sweetness of summer strawberries on top of a refreshing ice cream.

Heinz BBQ Creamz

It’s sweet, sticky and tongue-tinglingly delicious. The smoky mouth-watering flavour of Heinz Classic Barbecue sauce, in a Heinz Creamz. Team with maple syrup, pecans and perhaps a sprinkling of bacon bits and this sweet and smoky ice cream will really pack a punch.

Heinz Saucy Sauce Creamz

The curiously delicious Heinz Saucy Sauce is the perfect flavour blend of Heinz Tomato Ketchup and Heinz [Seriously] Good Mayonnaise in one delicious bottle. So curious in fact, it’s best served topped with peanuts, Heinz Thai Sweet Chilli Sauce and lime to recreate the flavours of a Pad Thai. A squeeze of Heinz Saucy Sauce creates a surprisingly sweet and tasty treat in a Heinz Creamz.

Hands up who else had never even heard of Saucy Sauce?

David Chalbert who has the awesome job of Senior Brand Manager for Heinz Sauces comments:

"This summer is looking different for many of us, and while we might be staycationing or staying at home more than in other years, it doesn’t mean you have to miss out on the joys of a good ice cream. Heinz sauces are here to help.

We give you the ultimate summer mash up; Heinz Creamz. A DIY ice cream kit, with an added summery squeeze of one of your favourite Heinz Sauces. So, you needn’t miss out on one of the sauciest of sweet treats (or six!) during a summer of social distancing.

We know it might seem like a bit of a crazy combo to some – but with Heinz always at the forefront of innovation, anything is possible."

We look forward to Heinz Beanz cheesecake.