The latest step in the government's determined campaign to put everything back to normal and ignore the fact that a fatal virus is still rampaging through the population has been announced.
Culture Secretary Oliver Dowden has declared that spas, beauty salons, tattoo parlours and tanning shops (sigh) are OK to reopen from Monday, and gyms, swimming pools and dance studios from the 25th of July.
However, Dowden didn't mention that beauty treatments involving the face are still not allowed, which means that facialists, eyebrow groomers, lash technicians and so on are still out of luck.
Vanita Parti, founder and chief exec of the Blink Brow Bar chain told the BBC she's "furious":
"We had to cancel 2,000 appointments in the first week of July, That's £3,000 that we had to write off.
A lot of people have escaped on holiday and they were looking forward to getting a beauty treatment before they travelled, which they didn't get."
However, it's now fine to go and potentially get skin cancer as well as covid-19 by going to a tanning shop, so yay.
Outdoor performances including dance, theatre and various kinds of music gigs will be allowed from this weekend, as long as the audience size is restricted and people watching follow the social distancing rules.
Similarly, there'll be restrictions on how many people can enter gyms and swimming pools, and attendees will be asked to get changed at home where possible -- though you won't have to wear a mask.
Some sports are also starting back up, with club cricket from tomorrow and even spectators allowed as long as they stick to groups of two households and socially distance.
There is of course a new slogan for this phase of the affair -- an extended remix of the embarrassing "eat out to help out" one from the restaurant announcement. Says Dowden:
"I'm really urging people to get out there and to play their part: buy the tickets for outdoor plays and musical recitals, get to your local gallery and support your local businesses.
Our fight began with a collective effort and I really hope it will end with one.
At the beginning we all stayed at home to protect the NHS and save lives, now the British public has a new part to play. It's time to eat out to help out, to enjoy the arts to help out and to work out to help out.
It's over to all of you to help the country recover safely."
It's important to remember later, when we're facing second and third waves of people drowning in their own fluids in intensive care, that the government not only allowed us to go and do non-essential things like laying on a sodding tanning bed, but actually urged us to. [Sky News]